Those of us with a Latina abuela know how blessed we are. Our abuelas taught us how to cook the most authentic Latino food; they taught us how to concoct a remedy for any sickness with whatever spices we had in the kitchen; most importantly, they taught us basically everything we know about life (and the afterlife).
See below for 10 lessons our abuelas ingrained in our souls:
1. Abuela: Barefoot
If you walk around the house barefoot, you will get sick and die.
"Mija, put some socks on."
2. Abuela: Vicks
You can cure anything with Vicks VapoRub and 7Up.
Stomach ache? A cold? Broken arm? Swine flu? Nothing a slather of vaporu and a cup of fizzy 7Up can't cure.
3. Abuela: Plate
You have to finish your plate.
"There are children starving in Mexico. Eat your tacos, gordita."
4. Abuela: Superstitions
You sneeze or shiver everytime a spirit passes through you.
Creepy. Thanks, abuela, for that bit of knowledge which I will never, ever be able to forget.
5. Abuela: Glass
Luckily, you can keep the spirits at bay with a glass of water.
Depending on the abuela, she may recommend you keep it under your bed, on top of the fridge, or behind the door. Either way, that water will definitely suck up all those bad vibes and spirits.
6. Abuela: Evil Eye
The evil eye is real, and it should be feared.
Better guard your babies with an azabache bracelet and keep some uncooked eggs handy.
7. Abuela: Perfume
Earache? She knows the cures.
Just spritz some perfume on a cotton ball and stick it in your ear. The alcohol in the perfume must have something to do with this hack's surprising effectivity.
8. Abuela: Constipations
Constipated? Every abuela has their own remedy.
Some advise you to slap your knees and sit up straight on the throne. Others tell you to drink plenty of hot water with lemon.
9. washing hair
There are certain things you should and definitely should not do on your period.
Definitely do not shampoo during that time of the month, because it will dry out your hair.
10. Abuela: Family
Family comes first.
Even when they're being pendejos.