Meet Twitter’s Overbearing, Religious Latina Mom: @SenoraCatolica

Meet Twitter’s Overbearing, Religious Latina Mom: @SeñoraCatólica
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Every good Catholic girl should follow the parody account Señora Católica on Twitter. It’s like having your disapproving mother stalking you online, reminding you how far you’ve strayed from Jesus’s flock now that you’ve taken up these loose, gringo morals from your friends.

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The account claims to originate in Mexico and whoever’s writing it is quite prolific, as there’s an equally funny and active account for followers in that country, too (@Sra_Catolica). I am fond of the American cultural analysis @SenoraCatolica provides. Being a lapsed Catholic who let New York City liberalism talk her out of the Holy Bible, I still occasionally crave the repressive shame on which I was raised as a young girl in a provincial border town and @SenoraCatolica delivers me that shame with her swift judgments about whether a given activity constitutes sin or PECADO, as she is fond of shouting in all caps.

Considering its use of Anita Bryant as the face of the account, my bet is that some clever homosexual writes it. (For the young, Anita Bryant is an infamous American, anti-gay, right-wing activist who terrorized the homosexual community throughout the 1970s.) Whoever it is, please keep it coming. I count on you.

@SenoraCatolica is like a moral compass for the modern Latina trying to navigate her way through this crazy, mixed-up world. From her reviews of this past Sunday’s Grammy Awards show, to the proper etiquette for Valentine’s Day, she’s tweeting at you, constantly, compulsively, like a power-crazed mother who can’t relinquish her complete control of your psyche.

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Here’s a sample of her work. I’ll do my best to interpret, but some forms of flagellation are solely for the Spanish-speaking.

@SenoraCatolica on Valentine’s Day, “Using the pretext of Saint Valentine for your slutty behavior: MORTAL SIN.”