Why You Should Be Dating More Than One Guy at a Time

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By: Coach Ronnie Ann Ryan for YourTango.com

It turns out, the secret to finding love and commitment is not committing too soon.

So many of my clients ask me whether dating more than one man at a time is a wise idea. As their search for love heats up, suddenly there are a multiple men who are interested in them and they don't know how to handle it. The other scenario is that these women fall in love too quickly with one guy and end up heartbroken time after time. Have either of these situations happened to you?

When I was looking for love, I often dated up to three guys simultaneously. I wasn't trying to hit some number in the Guinness Book of World Records. Rather, my goal was simple: to find a guy I could date more than three times, hoping this would lead to a relationship.

RELATED: The 7 Types of Guys You Meet While Online Dating

Frequently, men would drop out after one, two or three dates. Since there was no way to know who would stick around, I dated as many guys as I was interested in at the same time. That's why I'm an advocate for "volume dating."

I dated 30 men in 15 months in order to eventually meet my husband.

This is very different than dating more than one person long-term. Let me explain what I mean by "dating." From my perspective as a dating coach, dating entails only the first four to ten dates. Once you have an unspoken date on Saturday night (you both just already know you'll have plans with each other), you have moved into the first phase of a relationship.

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