Our Modern Latina Bride Grapples With the Guest List

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People have always told me what a nightmare it can be when creating your wedding guest list, but, of course, I thought it’d be different for me. After researching wedding guest list etiquette, I was certain that by following a few standards I could keep my initial (intimate) number down to 100 guests.

   The criteria is as follows:

- You must know both of us

- Be a close family member or a childhood friend (or friend of many years).

- If you’re totally single you, ALONE, will be invited. There’s no need for you to bring your flavor of the month, which I will never see again.

- You will be allowed a guest if you are in a serious relationship and/ or if you are flying out of town.

- No kids allowed except our nieces and nephews that will be walking in the wedding.

A few weeks later, as “people” began to casually find out we were getting married, I was shocked to find out how fresh some people can get when it comes to getting invited to a wedding. We had several people ask if they can be invited to the wedding or simply just assume that they were invited. In their defense, they would make the ‘friends’ cut if I were having a 250+ wedding, but I’m not, and they don’t meet the criteria I had established.

In the end, I don’t do well with confrontation and don’t have the heart to say, “sorry, but you’re not invited,” so like a sucker I agreed to invite them. My number has gone up to at least 140 guests and to avoid inviting any more I find myself not “catching up” with certain people at the moment or telling Hector to reschedule that dinner with acquaintances for sometime in the summer. I’m obsessed with dodging that potential additional wedding guest in efforts to try and keep my wedding to the size that I wanted and it’s hurting my social life! 

Help a bride out: should I be telling these people they are not invited or just suck it up to save face? 

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About this author1

Verky Arcos, Fashion Director

A  writer and editor with expertise in fashion and lifestyle coverage, Verky Baldonado is currently Latina magazine's Fashion Director. Baldonado has written Latin-inspired travel and food related content and has contributed to celebrity Q&As, red carpet video interviews, and the annual “Reasons to Love Being Latina” feature. Verky is U.S.-born and of Ecuadorean and Puerto Rican descent who speaks and writes fluent Spanish. Prior to Latina, Verky worked as a photo shoot coordinator at Universal/Island Def Jam Music Group. Verky holds a B.A. in Communications Arts from Montclair State University and currently resides in Manhattan with her husband and daughter.

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