9 Latinos Reveal Their Secrets To A Happy Marriage

In relationships, we tend to recall the bad times, especially when dishing to our BFFs. After a few margaritas, the woe-is-me fest begins: "My husband doesn't pick up after himself" or "I'm so tired of feeling like his mama" or "We don't communicate anymore." With talk like this, who'd want to get married?

Luckily, not everything is bad, and most couples love being married. We chatted with a few Latino couples that have managed to make it work. What's their secret to staying happily married? Here's what they said: 

MORE: 6 Relationship Myths — Busted!

1. Real Couple Marriage Advice: Ride-Or-Die

#1: “Be your spouse's ride or die.”

This doesn't mean taking a page out of Bonnie and Clyde’s book and committing an actual crime!.“It’s about being there for the good and the bad," Jesse, 37, said. “If your man is having a crappy time at work or isn't where he wants to be, you should be there to lift him up instead of kicking him when he's down.”

Jesse — who has been married for 11 years — also believes couples should support each other's dreams and aspirations, and focus on each other despite the responsibilities of parenthood. “Priorities change after kids, but we make sure to keep our relationship strong and give ourselves much-needed “us” time,” she continued. “With kids, it's easy to fall back and make it all about the kids.” 

2. Real Couple Marriage Advice: Sense Of Humor

#2: “Have a sense of humor.”

A wife for nine years and counting, Lourdes believes laughter is the best medicine for a happy relationship. “So you want to stay married,” she began. “Then have a sense of humor!” For Lourdes and her husband, Ray, keeping a positive mindset is important. “It's not a business agreement,” Ray told us. “It's a relationship, and some parts of it are not that serious."

So laugh lots with your spouse, chicas

3. Real Couple Marriage Advice: Strengths

#3: “Play to each other’s strengths.

Janice, 35, and her husband, Jayone, from Rochester, NY, married young. After 11 years of matrimony, these high school sweetheart have learned how important it is to play to each other's strengths.

“For example, I'm bad at laundry and groceries,” Janice admitted, “So he handles that. I do the cooking, because he makes a mess and I hate cleaning!” But it's not just about household chores and parental duties. "It's about appreciating what makes you different and making it work for your marriage and family," Janice added.

4. Real Couple Marriage Advice: Date Nights

#4: “Schedule Date nights.”

A 16-year marriage is quite impressive and Hipatia, 39, from NJ swears by date nights. And they don't even have to be crazy expensive!  “We try to do one every two months,” she explained. “A movie or dinner or dancing!” The parents of two also try to sneak in a couples getaway twice a year. “Vacations without kids rejuvenate a marriage. Having kids is great, however, a break from routine is a must!” And in their case, it works.

5. Real Couple Marriage Advice: Love Language

#5: “Know your love language.”

Learning your partner's love language is essential to a relationship’s success.  Jessica, 40, told us to “love your spouse the way they understand love.”

“You can't show love the way you want it,” the Jersey City native explained. “It won’t work.” And she knows how her husband of nine years wants to be loved and appreciated. “He cares about making sure our money situation is handled, so I always communicate how I'm spending it — not because I have to, but because I know it brings him peace. For me, I'm someone who needs affection and he knows that. So simply coming over to sit next to me when he sees me stressing out on my laptop is enough for that moment.”

6. Real Couple Marriage Advice: Really Listen

#6: “Really listen.”

Ah yes, listening! That would make a marriage work. But it isn't just any type of listening. Chantily, who's been married for eight years and together with her love for almost 13 years, explained to us the importance of active listening. “When either of you need to vent, when feelings are hurt, during arguments, and when making decisions, really listening to each other and respecting each other's feelings on the issues matters most," she said. It seems like common sense, but sometimes we only focus on our needs and feelings in relationships. “We get caught up in the stressful moments and forget to really listen even though it's so crucial," she added.

7. Real Couple Marriage Advice: Lust

#7: “Lust.”

Do you know what else is crucial in a marriage? Passion, lust, and yes, flirting. Never stop flirting with your partner! “Mutual respect, friendship, honesty (lots of that), reliability, love, accountability: all of that matters,” Lorraine, 51, explained. “But you need to feel sexually attracted to your mate. That´s the lust part!” 

8. Real Couple Marriage Advice: Grow Together

#8: “Grow together individually.”

There are different stages in life, and you're bound to grow and change as an individual. What does that look like when you're married? Well, you have to grow together as a couple. “We've changed. A lot,” Yanira, 31, revealed to us. She said that change has allowed them to understand each other and communicate better throughout their 10-year marriage. “We fight less. We've learned to compromise for the sake of the other's happiness without ever having to compromise on what makes us individually happy.” And they have fun in their new and improved skins. “We talk like we just met and laugh at things that once bothered us,” Yanira added. It's not easy, but it's worth it — and it's real.