And so the planning begins!
While I had some ideas of my own, I thought I should have a brainstorming session with my fiancé and get a feel for his thoughts on the nuptials. But when I sat down with Hector on a Saturday afternoon, super excited to begin laying out my dream wedding, I was hit with the harsh reality that Hector and I didn’t see eye to eye on this. Not only did Hec not want a big production; he also didn’t want to be all that involved in the planning process either – what’s a girl to do?!
His idea of the perfect wedding was eloping in a far away place and not having to deal with your typical wedding drama, but as romantic as that can be, as a Latina, family—and not just my immediate family—means everything to me! At that moment, I felt like that 5-year-old girl who dreams of having the perfect wedding—someone I never knew I was.
I pleaded with my future husband. I explained how a wedding (and not necessarily a huge one), filled with my closest family and friends was sooo important to me, and how he had to work with me on this—which he did. The compromise was that we would have a small, intimate ceremony and reception (100 guests) like I wanted, but he wouldn’t be intensely involved in the planning of it after all. I was initially not having it (there goes my compromise!), but Hector explained how planning the wedding is what brings drama and, at the end of the day, “the wedding is for the girl,” he said.
Really? After some discussion, I let him off the hook and took the compromise, only to later find out from other brides that this isn’t as uncommon as I thought. Of course, having to prepare for the big day solo was not my ideal plan as it is our wedding. But I looked on the bright side: this was a blessing in disguise. My man is very fashionable and opinionated—which is what attracted me to him in the first place—but with him not being “involved” I was free to choose whatever I fancied for my wedding. No más compromises. Yippee!
So ladies: what do you think? Was I too much of a softie in letting Hec off the hook or is this a bride’s dream—not having to incorporate things like your dude’s beer mugs?