In This Corner: "Beverly Hills, 90210" vs. "90210"

We nearly flipped when we learned that our favorite zip code was back in full effect...then we realized a new Beverly Hills, 90210 didn’t mean a a time machine was coming to whisk us into the glory days of our youth. The new version of the show, titled simply 90210, differs vastly from our distant memories of West Beverly Hills High. Naturally, we felt it was only right to pit the most anticipated show of the season against the one that defined an era, and come to a conclusion once and for all as to who rules the zip code.

Round One: Kiss and Tell

The original Beverly Hills, 90210 was more wholesome than multi-grain bread. Sure, the close-knit group of sheltered teens somehow managed to go through every major social issue of the time, everything from gay rights to South African apartheid, but when it came to sex, references were all we got. The new 90210 is a lot more risqué than the original version. Still, even with an, uh, oral incident in the first five minutes of the premiere episode, 90210 is PG compared to a lot of other shows (ahem, Gossip Girl).

The winner:
Tie. We are definitely enjoying the salaciousness of the new 90210, but what the old version lacked in on-screen scandalous behavior it made up for off-screen. Which leads us to...

Round Two: The Cast

The Beverly Hills, 90210 gang was more than a cast—it was an obsession. Clearly you recall your Luke Perry and Jason Priestly posters? How closely you tracked Tiffani-Amber Thiessen and Brian Austin Green’s off-screen relationship drama in Tigerbeat (hey, these were the days before Perez Hilton)? Or how details of Shannen Doherty's off-screen catfights with her co-stars totally overshadowed Brenda's on-screen drama?

Then again, the original cast was pretty unbelievable. They looked like 30-year old high school students (probably because many of them were actually 30-plus.) The new 90210 offers us a much younger, good-looking bunch. Perhaps the best improvement is the much-needed diversity. Now, we can even lust after Latino hotties Tristan Wilds and Michael Steger.

The Winner:
The new 90210. Just as hot, except younger and more diverse. Plus, for those of us who just can’t let go, we can look forward to recurring roles from some of our original favorites (or most-hated) like Jennie Garth and Shannon Doherty.

Round Three: Novelty

It was a different time in the '90s. Reality TV was a novelty. Music channels actually played music videos. And, most importantly, one television series captured all of our drama, teen angst, and love triangle madness (or allowed us an escape from the reality that our lives were nothing like that, sigh.) That of course, was the original Beverly Hills, 90210, a shiny new idea that popped up on the scene in 1990 and rocked our worlds for ten years. But can we really say that about the new 90210? Aren’t we a little oversaturated with the glitzy teen dramas as it is?

The Winner:
Beverly Hills, 90210. A teen drama in a glitzy locale just isn’t groundbreaking anymore. I mean can’t the new 90210 kids just move in with The Hills gang and save us some time on our TV schedule?

Final Tally:
Beverly Hills, 90210 takes this. Clearly you can’t compete with a show that defined an era, and no amount of fellatio (see Round One) can convince us otherwise. Now, if the new cast starts dating and/or fighting each other off-camera we might have to re-evaluate...