6 Reasons Thanksgiving Has Become the Neglected Stepchild of the Holidays

Halloween is over, which means it’s time for…Christmas?! Let’s face it: Thanksgiving is getting the shaft when it comes to holidays. Remember when there was a moment to breathe between Jack O’ Lanterns and Santa hats? We’ll be over here, hoping it changes back. Until then, we present the ways Thanksgiving has become totally negligible. 

1. November 1 Now Marks the Christmas Countdown

Seriously, we just got done dressing up as witches and now we gotta listen to Joy to the World on the radio and see Christmas decorations for sale everywhere?! GIVE US A MINUTE. 

2. Christmas Carols for Two Months – Solid

Speaking of music, since when has it become customary for radio stations to play holiday music 24 hours a day starting November 1? Not only that, but why are there are no Thanksgiving songs to commemorate the joyous occasion that is stuffing your face with Turkey every year? Even the two most popular ones originally actually written to commemorate Thanksgiving, Over the River and Through the Woods and Jingle Bells, were eventually adapted for Christmas time. Man, Thanksgiving just can’t catch a break. 

3. Two Words: Black Friday

Now it’s like stores don’t even WANT you to eat your Thanksgiving meal. You gotta get out there and shop! Doors open in the afternoon on Thursday, so why not just do Thanksgiving at 11? You know what, how about you just do a turkey day breakfast? In fact, let’s just skip it all together. Who needs Thanksgiving? You’ll be thankful for those GIFTS y’all. (And forget it if you actually work in retail. You better stay hydrated, because it’ll be a Thanksgiving miracle if you aren’t ready to sleep till the New Year after the madness.)

4. Candy… We Don’t Need No Stinkin’ Candy

Easter? Bunny shaped chocolate. Valentine’s Day? Hearts, everywhere. Halloween? Pumpkins, yo. Christmas? Trees! Thanksgiving…. Where my turkeys at?! No, really, where are they? Show me a holiday candy fiend who doesn’t want a chocolate turkey and I’ll show you a liar.

5. Doesn’t Even Get a Set Date

Every other holiday gets a set date, but Thanksgiving is a “special” holiday celebrated on the fourth Thursday of November. Hence the “Omigod it’s already Thanksgiving?” question that arises every. single. year. Sorry we overlooked you – again. 

6. Thanksgiving is Just Another Name for “The Christmas Kickoff”

Every holiday movie starts at Thanksgiving and ends at Christmas. All holiday shopping kicks off on Thanksgiving. Even the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade’s main star is Santa. Who cares about a turkey balloon when you’ve got the jolly man saying ho-ho-ho atop a sled?! NO ONE. Sorry, Thanksgiving. Maybe you’ll have your moment… some day.