And I’m not talking about the Ashton Kutcher show here. Yesterday when I walked into work I received an unexpected message from my girl. My jaw dropped, she had been totally punked.
"I'm now single," the message began.
As it turns out, she recently found out that her boyfriend was engaged to someone else the entire time they had been dating. He flat-out lied to her about his "ex," and in the end he was still living with and planning on marrying another woman.
My friend gave this guy the benefit of the doubt when they started dating; he mentioned he was ending his relationship and in the process of moving out right off the bat. But there were some major red flags my girl admitted to ignoring, which, in the end, led to her discovery of his double life. So, in an effort to make sure this doesn't happen again, I'm going to share with you the shady behavior that exposed this con artist for the total sleazeball he really is:
- He never called her when he was home, only sent text messages. This is a really crucial sticking point, chicas. If a dude doesn't want to actually talk to you, even if he isn't leading a double life, this is shady behavior.
- She was never allowed to call him at home because he claimed that he "wasn't a phone person." Okay, this one made me roll my eyes at my amiga. If you are dating someone, you should be able to call them where they live. Period.
- He mentioned he was still living with his "ex" and that he was moving out, but never spoke about his new apartment and she never followed up. She never saw where he lived. This is preposterous!
- He never introduced her to his children. Although he was honest about having them, he never once even offered to introduce them. Ladies, if you are dating a man and he has kids, he should definitely want you to meet them if there is any chance of things getting serious between you.
- He never went to her family parties and also didn’t go to her godmother’s funeral. This is a universal red flag! If a guy likes you, he wants to know everything about you, including meeting your family and finding out where you come from. He should also want to help support you if you go through an emotional experience like losing a loved one.
You live and you learn, and my friend definitely has! Luckily they weren’t together too long, and I told her it’s better she found out now versus down the road.
Have any of you ever been totally and completely punked by a man who was leading a double life? Have you ever led a second life yourself?